Kermit The Frog and Fozzie Bear, "Movin' Right Along"
Oh wow. I'd forgotten all about this song in the decades since I last saw The Muppet Movie--well, about all of it except the "fork in the road" gag--until Dahlia Lithwick linked to it in her Slate piece last week about Order Muppets and Chaos Muppets. After watching it and feeling a rush of joy in the thing, I decided the clip needed to show up here, too.
I fear I'm an Order Muppet. I don't want to be. Until I was reading it, I would have thought for certain I was a Chaos Muppet if you asked me. Except I realize all-too-well that while I may be floppy, stuffed and made of felt, I am the sort who is more Bert than Ernie, more Kermit than Gonzo. The ScatterKat is absolutely a Chaos Muppet, there is zero doubt about that. But I have that neurotic urge to have things fall into certain set ways. These things aren't absolutes: the ScatterKat has been adamant that the kitchen drawers need to be organized (not, please note, reorganized) because apparently there's something wrong with just throwing all the wooden spoons, knives, spatulas, ladles, measuring spoons, meat thermometers, chip bag clips, cheese grater and gods know what else into a single kitchen drawer. (Honestly, I didn't know that isn't how it's done.) But almost all the rest of the time, that's me trying to keep the stagehands in line and the variety acts ready to go on cue; you just need to keep in mind that without a tragically unfunny bear or a weird purple thing dancing with chickens or a sow with anger management issues, there simply isn't a show at all. We Order Muppets need Chaos Muppets, however we might furrow our brows sometimes. I.e., to quote Lithwick, "Too many Order Muppets means no cookies for anyone."
I fear I'm an Order Muppet. I don't want to be. Until I was reading it, I would have thought for certain I was a Chaos Muppet if you asked me. Except I realize all-too-well that while I may be floppy, stuffed and made of felt, I am the sort who is more Bert than Ernie, more Kermit than Gonzo. The ScatterKat is absolutely a Chaos Muppet, there is zero doubt about that. But I have that neurotic urge to have things fall into certain set ways. These things aren't absolutes: the ScatterKat has been adamant that the kitchen drawers need to be organized (not, please note, reorganized) because apparently there's something wrong with just throwing all the wooden spoons, knives, spatulas, ladles, measuring spoons, meat thermometers, chip bag clips, cheese grater and gods know what else into a single kitchen drawer. (Honestly, I didn't know that isn't how it's done.) But almost all the rest of the time, that's me trying to keep the stagehands in line and the variety acts ready to go on cue; you just need to keep in mind that without a tragically unfunny bear or a weird purple thing dancing with chickens or a sow with anger management issues, there simply isn't a show at all. We Order Muppets need Chaos Muppets, however we might furrow our brows sometimes. I.e., to quote Lithwick, "Too many Order Muppets means no cookies for anyone."
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